Only With Your Heart - 6
At some point, the conversation shifted to talk of Karasawa’s former girlfriend. It was when they had finished eating, and were drinking their coffee or tea.
Surprisingly, he had only dated one woman up until now. And that relationship had naturally ended when they started working.
"One day I couldn't get in contact with her anymore. We were hardly meeting once work started. I suppose it couldn't be helped…"
Karasawa said with a shrug.
Chizuru was not sure what she should say.
She wasn't perplexed by what he was saying. He was only relaying an old story as if it were amusing. However, his reaction now had made her feel something. Like she had been stabbed in the heart.
“...Can I...ask you something?”
Before she had time to really think, the question poured out of her mouth.
“If a woman that you loved, suddenly disappeared...what would you think? Were you angry, or sad or…”
Karasawa’s eyes widened in surprise. He stared at her. He thought about it for a while, then answered slowly, as if carefully choosing his words.
“At first, yes… I was dumbstruck. It didn’t feel real to me. It was all a joke, and tomorrow, everything would return to normal as if nothing had ever happened.”
“When the reality sank in and I understood the situation, I was angry for a long time… I think. But that feeling didn’t last. I was so lonely. It was more loneliness than sadness.”
Every word that Karasawa spoke seemed to stab through her chest.
Karasawa and Lukrov were completely different in personality, the world they lived in and the way that they thought. But with a similar experience, the answer that one man gave her felt painfully real to Chizuru. Just thinking about how Lukrov might have felt the same made it difficult for her to breath.
“How long, how long were you able to stay in love with her after you separated?”
It might have been because her face was so serious. Karawa’s shoulders became stiff and his mouth tightened.
It could not be a fun memory to have to recall, but he looked at her and appeared to be trying to remember. And then.
"...I promised not to talk about this anymore. But to be honest, I think that I was dragging this with me until I saw you. In other words, until I fell in love again."
Chizuru barely remembered what they talked about after that.
She had a vague memory of Karasawa acting as if his confession had not happened, and talking pleasantly about other things. But all of what was said had cleanly passed through one ear and gone out the other.
As he had promised, he acted like a gentleman until the end. And when they finished, the two of them walked to the station together. The rain had died down a little now. He bought one of the few remaining umbrellas at the convenience store near the station, and they said goodbye and went their separate ways.
She swayed alone on the train, arrived at her stop, left the ticket gate and opened her umbrella...and then it happened. Tears filled Chizuru’s eyes.
(Until I fell in love again...)
In the other world, where fifteen years might have already passed. Had Lukrov fallen in love again?
In Chizuru’s mind, she saw his hand touch the cheek of a woman she did now know. His deep voice whispered softly into the woman’s ear.
Her heart shouted in denial, and she tightly gripped the handle of her umbrella. The rain made it difficult to see, clouding her vision even further.
She was assaulted by a powerful ringing in her ears. Chizuru’s umbrella dropped to the ground.
At the same time, she felt a wave of dizziness that made it hard to stand. The ringing wouldn’t stop, no, it was getting louder. Her head throbbed with pain.
It was just like this morning.
It was the same sensation, the same mysterious sound that had led her to Lukrov’s world, and had taken her from it.
She pleaded with a trembling voice. “Take me! Take me back to Lukrov!”
The passersby looked at her oddly as she seemed to talk to herself. But she didn’t care.
From somewhere far away, she heard the ‘voice.’
Her eyes filled with tears once again, but this time with a different emotion.
‘Will you...return… Will...you...save...him...this time…”
“I will! Let me! I will save the kingdom, the world, anything, but please take me back to Lukrov!”
She had a feeling that she would never get a chance again if she missed this one… It was the same resolve she had when she had returned to her sick grandmother.
However, unlike that time, there was no uncertainty. Her only regret was that she could not say anything to Mai before leaving her forever. But everything else meant nothing to her.
“Take me back!”
Yes. It was right after she shouted into the sky of a place unknown.
Her vision suddenly filled with golden light, her body began to float...and just like that, she was swallowed up by light and became unconscious. Next Chapter *** Translator: Thanks for reading. There might not be a chapter for a while, but please support this by rating or reviewing if you would like it to continue. Thank you.